Can you come home again?
Sometimes the transition of coming home after living away at school is slightly rocky. Before thinking about coming home the first weekend, check out this advice.
If your child is going to school out of town, don’t let them come home for a couple of weeks. It is important that they learn how to navigate their college/university on the weekend. They need to participate in events on campus. They need to start building those friendships. This is when the bonding to the institution and the creation of friendships happen. It won’t happen if they come home every weekend.
Make plans with your friends from home for a weekend about 3 weeks or more after you start classes. Why 3 weeks?
Everyone will have time to get acclimated. You will have stories to share. You will know what you need that you didn’t bring with you the first time and can have the parents take you on a shopping spree. You will probably need to do laundry by now too…
When you go back home, you are back with your parents and their house rules. Everyone knows that you have crafted your own life and you live in your own time zones at school. But you aren’t at school anymore. Show your parents some respect and maturity by talking about the house rules when you come back. And remember that it is their house. If they are paying for school for you, you better be compliant. Regardless, they are your parents and respect to them and the other members of the household is paramount.
Understand that your student has started to become their own person. Your student can stay out until any time they want when they are at school. A curfew at home may be a tough pill to swallow. Sit down and discuss the new rules. Give them some leeway and show them you trust them. With that said, you don’t have to throw away your rules. Maybe just make a slight modification?
Send a love note and a care package after about one week. Texts, emails, and Skype sessions are great, but the brownies, peanut butter, etc in the care package go a LONG way. It’s also easy to make friends when you have a box of brownies! If you aren’t a baker, go on QVC or HSN and send some of those products! Don’t forget to include some cash in the love note!
Next Up: University Rules 201
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