I’m not going to say you automatically need to be checked into a mental institution if you shop on Thanksgiving or line up before the rooster gets up on November 29th. Maybe it’s a family tradition. Maybe you don’t have family around and this is what you want to do with your time. More power to you. I am pretty confident I am not going out a limb when I say that if you get sucked in by any of these promotions you need to turn in your sanity card.
Macy’s: Free Lil Wayne compilation album with a $50 purchase
I couldn’t find any actual proof of this but there are sites around the web saying it. There’s this place called Amazon.com where you can purchase his music. If you buy this sweater or these $68 fleece pants from his new clothing line at Macy’s, I hope you have lots of fun listening to that sweet album in the insane asylum.
Taubman Prestige Outlets: $20 Gift Card
Be one of the first 500 people in line at the Brooks Brothers entrance and you’ll get a $20 gift card. I squinted really hard to read the fine print so that I could tell you that this is in fact a $20 gift card good for Taubman not just Brooks Brothers. When I first heard this on the radio I thought that the world had completely gone mad if 500 people were going to show up just for a $20 Brooks Brothers gift card. We’re talking a store where the “deal” on their site is that they will ship your things for free if you spend over $200. Even with it being a $20 general gift card, it’s still only $20. Maybe I lead too privileged of a life but $20 isn’t enough to make me want to stand in 20 degree weather for any length of time, especially in the middle of the night.
Aéropostale: Free pair of Skullcandy earbuds when you spend $100 or more. With a purchase of $150 or more you get a pair of Skullcandy 2XL headphones.
That’s a lot of money to be spending at that store. Wouldn’t it be easier to go online and take advantage of the $75 free shipping? Those prices seem pretty darn cheap. Still really want the headphones? Go to the Skullcandy website and take advantage of this deal to get a free shirt or hoodie with a $30 purchase.
Hickory Farms: Spend $50 and get a free tote bag.
1) Do you really need another tote bag? 2) Who shops at Hickory Farms? These things are expensive and they don’t exactly scream FRESH! to me. Maybe I am spoiled living down the street from the Soulard Farmers Market, but if I’m getting a block of cheese for the holidays, I want it to come from Baetje Farms. If I’m getting summer sausage I want it to come from G&W and I want to know the person buying it enjoyed an ice cold Busch Bavarian while purchasing it.
Walmart: Various “Deals”
I’ll admit Walmart has some good deals. A 60″ television for $688, a 32″ one for $98 or an iPad Mini for $299 with a $100 Walmart gift card are all good deals. The “1-Hour In Stock Guarantee” which says that if any of these items sells out within the first hour on Thanksgiving night you will be able to still buy one, guarantees that it will be shipped to your local store by Christmas. Kudos to Walmart on that. However, if you throw elbows for any of the below “deals” we don’t even know what to do with you.
$9 iFrogz Earbuds: Earbuds are a lot like sunglasses in my opinion. You’re always losing them or breaking them so why spend a bunch on a pair? Anywhere you look you can find earbuds for under $10. If you are really stuck on the iFrogz then click this link to get them for $9.99 with free shipping right now.
$114.96 Beats by Dr. Dre Solo Headphones: Do you really need to spend this much money on headphones? Sure these typically go for $200 but why not just click this link and buy these headphones for $110.99 now and get free shipping?
RCA 7″ Tablet and $178 Laptop: These are both on this list of “deals” to avoid on Black Friday at Walmart. Will they sell out? Most likely and it’s because there are a lot of people out there that think all tablets and laptops are all created equal. My heart breaks for people receiving these gifts.
Target: $199.99 Beats By Dr. Dre MIXR Headphones
Again do you really need to spend $200 on headphones? You would be better off buying these now online at Kohl’s now. It’s free shipping on anything over $50 and for spending $200 there they will email you $60 in Kohl’s Cash.
Kmart: $499.99 1/2 ct. 10 kt. certified diamond bridal set
If you 1) buy this and 2) tell your bride that you bought this on sale at Kmart I will gladly take the under in a bet on how long you think your marriage will last. Don’t you dare buy this and justify it because it’s more than Sugar Bear spent on Mamma June’s ring.
Overview
Hopefully by now most people realize that the Black Friday shopping, even when extended into Thursday doesn’t always offer the best deals. I like to think that at least 50% of the people out shopping on Thursday or Friday are doing it more as a family/friends tradition than as actual bargain hunting. But then I look at videos like this and realize that all hope is lost in the world.