#1: Here Comes Honey Boo Boo

Sure we’re ashamed that we wasted an hour of our lives engrossed in a show where a family of rednecks with nicknames like Honey Boo Boo, Chickadee and Sugar Bear constantly burp and fart, play in the mud, let their pet pig run around the house squealing and say things like “You better redneckognize” but there we are, tuned in to TLC, losing brain cells by the minute as we laugh at that crazy little 6 year old and her redneck family. Landing on Honey Boo Boo while channel surfing and not being instantly sucked in would be like sitting in a McDonald’s restaurant and not tasting one single mouth-watering McDonald’s french fry…it just isn’t possible! If my McDonald’s analogy doesn’t work for you, [insert your favorite really unhealthy food here].

#2. Craft Wars

First off, it’s hosted by one of the Top Love To Hate Celebrities: Tori Spelling. Second, I can easily see why people love it, for the same reason that there’s a show called Hoarders. People love stuff. “Oh my gosh, that girl just made a 6ft snake out of old paint cans, music instruments and glitter. How cool!”

Just like in Storage Wars and Pawn Stars, people always want more stuff. Who cares if you have no use for it, or it has no value. Instead of throwing those old paint cans and scrap metal pieces away, you can make them into a huge snake. And then guess what you have! Old paint cans and scrap metal in the shape of a snake. Have a broken crayon? Heat it up, pour it into a heart shaped cup and make a new crayon! …Umm or you could go buy some new crayons. While I’m not interested in crafting or having a bunch of useless crafting tools all over my house, I will say for those 22.5 minutes (I took some time out for the commercials) when I was watching people make really cool art projects out of metal, tape and glue, I almost wanted to run out and buy some glitter and a glue gun. But then the show ended and I was able to snap out of it just in time to remember my disgust for clutter and useless objects taking up space in my house. Damn you Tori Spelling for almost turning me into a craft junkie!

#3. High School Moms

We’ve all been watching American Idol for years, but does that mean we don’t also tune into The X Factor and The Voice? No way! It’s the same with Teen Mom and High School Moms. This new pregnant at 15 fad that’s sweeping through the country has us all in shock and awe, enough to tune in weekly to gawk and put in our own 2 cents. Between yelling at them for their stupidity and irresponsibility and crying for them for having to endure pregnancy and parenting at such a young age, we’re addicted.

 #4. Long Island Medium

I haven’t actually watched this one. I personally have a hard time believing in mind reading, magic and mediums when watching them on tv, but I heard someone talking about it and she completely believes that Theresa is the real thing, so this must be one amazing show to turn completely normal, rational people into believers. I will say, hearing about it made me think about why I get so freaked out by haunted houses and ghost stories. I, like many others, don’t want to believe in them or openly admit that I believe in them, but deep down we all do…and maybe that’s why I can’t watch this one myself.

#5. My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding

It’s like Jersey Shore meets My Super Sweet Sixteen meets Redneck Island…all of the worst characteristics of the people from each of those shows thrown together in one show. As the saying goes: It’s like a train wreck. You want to turn away but you can’t. You have incest, diva smack downs, bling, bling and more bling. Although I can say I am learning so much from this show. Here’s what I’ve learned so far: To be a gypsy, a girl must let a boy grab her and twist her arm until she kisses him, regardless of whether or not he’s her cousin, so that she’s married before she turns 21 or she’ll be considered an old maid. Then she must wear the most blinged out, Swarovski crystallized wedding dress she can find before running off to live subordinately under her new husband in their tricked out trailer.

So it turns out that it’s ok that we love to watch these shows; some of them are very valuable for learning important life lessons!

I don’t have too much time left to fit in to my TLC watching schedule, especially with the new seasons of Glee, The Voice and Hart of Dixie coming up, but if there’s another TLC show that you hate to love, or just love, please share and I’ll find a way to fit it in.

 

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